TL;DR:
A young Taiwanese woman, raised in a devout Buddhist and folk-religion family, becomes a passionate Christian. When she decides to be baptized, her parents object strongly. Her father fears angering ancestors and losing spiritual protection. Her mother worries that Lily’s Christianity will destroy her marriage prospects. This case study raises complex cross-cultural and pastoral issues. The page includes an acrostic and eight issues that need to be carefully considered in situations like this.
Should the young lady go against her parents' wishes and be baptized?
A young lady in Taiwan wants to publicly express her newfound Christian faith through baptism.
She worries about the possible consequences for her relationship with her disapproving Buddhist parents and for her own cultural identity.
The young lady's parents fear that her conversion to Christianity will displease their ancestors. They also worry about her future marriage prospects.
The missionary pastor wonders if advising the young lady to defy her parents' wishes will damage his relationship with them and perhaps even harm his community outreach efforts.
"What do they know about baptism? How can I bend God's commands in order to please them?" Peter Smith asked himself. A young Baptist missionary to Taiwan, he had been looking forward to conducting his first baptism in the church he was planting just outside the capital city of Taipei.
His excitement over that baptismal service had faltered after Lily's parents had come to his home. They had been furious, demanding that he not baptize their daughter, Lily, the next day as planned. Now, what was he going to do?
Smith recalled what he knew of the bright young woman. Lily Liu had grown up in a Buddhist home where she had been surrounded by Buddha images and the accompanying smell of incense. Lily first heard of Christianity from the Smiths when they moved in next door. Lily and her family immediately became friends with these Americans.
After four years of fighting doubts and internal opposition, Lily had made a solid commitment to Jesus Christ. Her testimony of faith in Christ was so dynamic that the youth
group elected her as their first woman president.
Her father's religion was a mixture of Buddhist and folk beliefs. When he returned from work each evening, Mr. Liu made sure incense was lit before the images. As a bus driver, he did not want to offend his ancestors. If he did offend them, they might cause him to have an accident. Like many other bus drivers, he scattered ghost money made of yellow tissue paper along dangerous mountain roads. He did this for protection from the spirits of people who had died there in past accidents.
Mrs. Liu was a loving mother who cooked, washed, cleaned, and said prayers for her children. Like her husband, she took her religious beliefs seriously. Once, she forbade telephone company workers to put up a pole in front of her house because she feared it would block the passage of her gods.
Although neither Mr. nor Mrs. Liu was a Christian, they allowed Lily to participate freely in church activities. They even occasionally attended services with her. They drew the line, however, when Lily decided to be baptized.
"I like what you teach," Mr. Liu had said to Peter Smith, "but what do you think my ancestors will say if I accept your religion? They would be very upset. How can
I do something that would displease my ancestors?"
Mr. Liu was also concerned that his daughter Lily would not abandon their family traditions. Among other things, he wanted to be cared for in his afterlife. So, he needed Lily to venerate his spirit after his death.
Mrs. Liu's opposition to Lily's baptism centered on something else: Lily's prospects for marriage. At the time the case was written, only about 2 percent of Taiwan's population was Christian. Lily's mother knew that if Lily were a Christian, it would be much harder to find her a husband.
Peter Smith pondered the situation. He knew that Lily would arrive shortly, seeking his direction.
Should he advise her to ignore her parents' orders? If he did so, it might destroy the relationship he and his wife had been carefully developing with Mr. and Mrs. Liu and their other neighbors.
Should he suggest that Lily wait, thereby delaying her opportunity to give public testimony to her transforming faith in Christ?
This case study appeared in its original form in Case Studies in Missions, edited by Paul and Frances Hiebert, Baker Book House. Edited and used with
permission. This case study may be reproduced only upon payment of a 35-cent royalty per copy to Baker Book House, P.O. Box 6787, Grand Rapids, MI 49516 USA.
Acrostic: Baptism — What is it?
B — Believers publicly declare their faith in Christ.
A — An act of obedience that follows Jesus' example.
P — A picture of cleansing from sin and new life in Christ.
T — A testimony to the transformation Christ brings.
I — Identification with Christ and the community of believers.
S — A sign of the believer's commitment to follow Christ.
M — A marker of spiritual renewal and a new beginning.
Christian Baptism for Someone Whose Family Is Rooted in Another Religion
When someone seeking Christian baptism comes from a family that opposes this decision because of strong ties to another religion, several issues should be considered:
Family Dynamics and Relationships, especially if family members view the baptism as a betrayal or rejection of their religious heritage. The family may see Christian baptism as a loss of cultural or ethnic identity. That is particularly true if the religion is closely tied to cultural traditions.
Personal Safety and Well-being: In some families or communities, converting to another religion leads to social ostracization, emotional abuse, or even physical danger. The person must evaluate possible risks and have a plan for their safety. We must think about whether the person has access to a supportive community that can offer emotional, spiritual, and possibly material support if and when the family relationship deteriorates.
Religious and Spiritual Considerations: The person should have a clear understanding of what baptism represents in Christianity. That includes its spiritual significance and the commitment involved. This decision must be based on deep personal conviction rather than on other reasons.
Pastoral Guidance: Having an ongoing relationship with a pastor or spiritual adviser is important. Such a person can offer guidance, help deal with family opposition, and verify that the individual is prepared to embrace the spiritual and relational effects of their decision.
Legal and Societal Ramifications: In some countries, converting from one religion to another can have legal ramifications. These may include changes in legal status, inheritance rights, or custody issues. The person seeking baptism should be aware of such legal issues. Beyond the family, the broader community may also exert pressure. This pressure could range from social isolation to physical persecution.
Ethical and Moral Considerations: The person should thoughtfully consider how best to communicate their decision to their family. Being honest while remaining sensitive to their family's feelings is important, though it may be challenging. While a person's decision is personal, it is important to be respectful of the family's beliefs. The situation must be approached with empathy and understanding. Ways must be sought to maintain relationships.
Psychological and Emotional Impact: The process of conversion and ensuing family conflict can be emotionally taxing. The person should consider seeking counseling or therapy to manage the stress and emotional challenges. Transitioning to a new faith while dealing with family opposition can lead to an identity crisis. Balancing new beliefs with respect for one's heritage can be a complex and emotionally challenging process.
Timing and Process: Sometimes, taking a gradual approach to discussing and revealing the decision to the family may help keep tensions in check. Sudden, unexpected announcements can shock people and lead to a rapid escalation of tensions. A more gradual discussion may allow time for adjustment. Thoughtfully preparing for the conversation with the family, possibly with the support of a pastor or someone who can act as a mediator, may help soften negative reactions.
In summary, the decision to be baptized in a religious and cultural setting like this one should be approached with careful thought, preparation, and a strong support system.
